josh and i are back from our trip to hermann and man did we need that! it was nice to have jason and emily's company and just relax for awhile. although we had originally planned on just the two of us going it was definitely a blessing we decided to take them along. it forced us to have a good time and not sit there and talk about babies all weekend. also, emily is pretty much instant entertainment bottled up into about 99 pounds. i am thinking about making it a rule to take her along wherever we go:)
because we took kemper along with us we drove separately which allowed us some time to talk on our 2 1/2 hour drive home. i think i had already came to the conclusion that using an egg donor makes the most sense but i wasn't sure what josh was thinking and wanted him to give me his thoughts first. to my surprise, he too felt like using an egg donor was the appropriate path to choose. the obvious decision for us is to use my sister's eggs as they would have my genes. plus, let's face it, she makes some pretty good looking kids. lucky for us she is on board. while we can't make any definite decision until after our consultation it is nice to know she is open to looking into it.
i know a lot of you are thinking, possibly cringing, at how this all sounds and i understand. i assure you, we have not taken this decision lightly. we both know there is more involved than just taking some of cassidy's eggs. cass and i have had several very candid conversations about all of the thoughts and emotions that go into something like this. josh and i are also planning to sit down with her and jd both to make sure we cover all bases before making the ultimate decision. as cassidy stated, if i needed a kidney she would give me a kidney, this isn't much different than that. ok, it kind of is, but you know what i mean. it would be very different if i were asking her to carry a child for nine months and then hand it over to me. she will be giving me cells, sure they will contain her dna but i will carry and birth the child. we have discussed everything from the day the child is born to whether or not we should tell the child at some point. she has assured me that if she has any hesitation for whatever reason she will let me know. it would not be worth all the babies in the world if it jeopardized our relationship.
we are waiting to hear back from dr. brabec regarding a consultation date and i will let you know as soon as i do. they told us at our follow-up that it could be 4-6 weeks. honestly, it is kind of nice to have some down time from all of the craziness. i am continuing to eat healthy, and trying to get my body as ready as possible to carry a baby. i am going to do a 3-day juice detox over the weekend to get rid of all the toxins in my body so if you get some cranky posts from me you will know why:) however this works out i am so grateful to have a sister that is willing to help us in such a selfless way. i have, in the mean time, ordered every book imaginable on using an egg donor and will be posting all of my new knowledge along the way!
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